It was just a few hours away from Sira's wedding day; soon hundreds of guests would be swarming in from the surrounding areas. In the village, last-minute preparations were being made. It should have been Sira's happiest day in her life, but still - something was nagging at her, something deep within her told her something was wrong. She had meet Achmad, her Arab boyfriend, some four months earlier while she was working as a waitress in downtown Jerusalem. He seemed nice enough, as they often worked the same shifts together late into the night. A romance began, and before she knew it she was living with him in his village outside of Jerusalem. The wedding was planned and so was her conversion to Islam, a requirement that he had insisted on.
Now, just hours before her big moment, something was nagging at her. Sira placed a call to her sister, who was the only family member still talking to her. Her sister, who had been in close contact with our staff, begged Sira to call Rebbetzin Baranes, who lives with the girls at the Jerusalem Women's shelter - just to talk with her. After some time, Rebbetzin Baranes convinced Sira to come over to the shelter in order to talk things over.
Our rescue team went into action, entering the village in broad daylight - not an easy task at all, but because the hour was late we could not afford to miss a moment. Sira was picked up and brought over to the shelter. In a matter of a very few short hours, Sira realized that she almost made the mistake of her life, and she decided then to stay at the shelter and not return for "her wedding".
It was not easy, but Sira pulled though and made it, with the help of the workers and volunteers at the shelter. The Arab boyfriend looked for her everywhere, but after not finding her gave up and moved on. After a period of some nine months, Sira was ready once again for her wedding day - this time to a nice Jewish yeshiva boy. A new Jewish family was taking root in the Holy Land.
It was a real "simcha" that could have turned out tragic, and was saved just in the nick of time. With your help and support, we were able to make a difference in the life of Sira. With your continuous support, we can continue to make a difference for the many more Siras that are on the streets and in jeopardy.
Captives in Their Own Land
29 July 2008, shiurtimes.com
As Sara prepared to jump out of the third- floor window, she recalled there was a phrase that Jews were meant to say when sacrificing their lives. Not knowing when her father and brothers were intending to come and kill her, she had no time to spare. "Baruch atah Hashem Elokenu Melech Haolam Shehakol nihei bidvaro*," she cried–the only Jewish phrase she could think of– as she made the plunge.
Miraculously, Sara survived the fall, suffering a broken jaw and losing most of her teeth. Mustering her resources she escaped from the Arab village and reached the center of Israel. After a few days of living on the streets a woman noticed Sara and put her in touch with Chadei Meir. Soon Sara was living in a woman's shelter, safe from her father and brothers, and on her way to recovery, both physically and emotionally.
There are thousands of women like Sara throughout Israel; Jewish women living as prisoners in Arab homes.
According to Levi Chazen, one of the directors of Chasdei Meir, "This problem has been going on since Jews have returned here, since the State of Israel has been around."
Today, women in mixed marriages can be found in Haifa, Lod and even the Old City of Jerusalem. Chasdei Meir was founded 12 years ago to save these women from their disastrous relationships and keep them safe until all danger has passed and they are prepared to return to Israeli society. The organization is named after Rabbi Meir Kahane, who organized a similar rescue operation in the 1970s.
At first, Chasdei Meir simply placed the women in safe houses. Then the organization joined forces with Rebbetzin Rachel Baranes, who had been doing similar work out of her own house. Today she runs the Chasdei Meir women's shelter, a place where rescued women receive protection along with much needed counseling and support.
The problem has been so prevalent for so long, emphasizes Chazen, that some of the girls in the shelter today are from the second generation of these marriages.
Her father's prisoner
Sara is one of these girls. Her Jewish mother had married an Arab and had his children. When she was a teenager, Sara's mother informed her that she was really a Jew. Interested in finding out more about her Jewish roots, Sara began asking questions and reading books about Jews and Judaism. In response, her father and brothers locked her in a room on the third floor of their house, allowing her no human contact.
Sara's continued interest in Judaism was an embarrassment to her male relatives. They decided to kill her, but Sara's mother warned the girl, triggering Sara's desperate escape.
"Once a woman has children with the Arab, it is very difficult for her to cut the ties," notes Chazen. "Usually they can't take the children out with them, and most of the time they don't want to leave them. So they just live their lives there in misery as prisoners."
Today Sara has fully returned to the Jewish people and is happily married to a young man learning in yeshiva. Unfortunately, there will be no such happy ending for her mother.
How can this happen?
"Everyone is always asking, How can this happen?" says Chazen. "How can a Jewish girl get involved with an Arab? Today, they are very slick. They speak perfect Hebrew. They learn in the universities. They are at the beaches and in the bars where they pick up Jewish girls.
"What happens in just about every case that I have dealt with over the years is that in the beginning they lure them in with presents and gifts and making them into queens. And then it always turns ugly. Abuse, beatings, being locked up in rooms for months on end."
These women come from all religious and financial backgrounds; wealthy and poor, observant and secular. Girls from large families frequently welcome the unaccustomed attention during the courting period. Many times the girls do not even realize that their admirer is not Jewish.
"He told me his name was Nati and that he was 26 years old," says one of the young women living in the shelter, who was raised in an ultra-orthodox family. " He told me that he wanted to go learn in yeshiva and strengthen himself. I was, at the time, 21 years old. I was working part-time as a waitress and helping in an institute for Jews returning to Judaism. It was then that I meet Nati. He took me to movies, wined and dined me, bought me all that I wanted. After two months I fell in love with him." When this young woman discovered that her boyfriend was an Arab, she was too attached to him to break it off. It was only after the regular beatings began that she found the courage to call Rebbetzin Baranes and get help. Why would an Arab man want to get involved with a Jewish woman?
"They look at it as a way to conquer the Jewish people," Chazen explains. "They are the minority in Israel. For them to capture a Jewish woman and to bring her home and abuse her is a show of power."
Frequently the Arab man already has one wife at home, and the Jewish woman become a servant to the family and is regularly abused. Many times they are held as prisoners. Any attempts to escape are countered with more abuse and threats against the woman's family.
Still in danger
When a woman calls Chasdei Meir, sometimes the workers are able to just pick her up at a designated spot and bring her to the shelter. At other times a show of force is necessary. "I can not tell you too much about the actual rescue missions because they are still going on," says Chazen.
After the girls are rescued, they are still in danger from their former husband or boyfriends, which is why the shelter is necessary. Located in a secure area and guarded at all times, the shelter provides the women with the support and care needed to help them heal. Until a woman is safe she cannot leave the shelter, even to visit her family. Many times the Arab family members patrol the area in attempt to reach the women. The woman remains hidden until it is the danger has passed and the Arab has lost interest or married someone else.
Rebbetzin Baranes and a groups of volunteer social workers and psychologists help the women in the shelter find the path to recovery. The healing process is a long one. Rejected by their families, many of these women only have each other. Rebbetzin Baranes becomes their second mother. With a mother's pride Rebbetzin Baranes shows visitors her picture album featuring the wedding pictures of over 600 women from the shelter. "Our success rate is very high," says Chazen, "over 85 percent. Most of the women that we deal with come back to the Jewish people and to being productive citizens in Israel"
Preventative Measures
Chazen feels that most girls can be steered away from these relationships. But, due to their limited funds Chasdei Meir is unable to hire the necessary staff to reach all the girls who may be at risk. Currently Rebbetzin Baranes does most of the work on her own, traveling to high schools throughout the country educating girls on the dangers of getting involved with an Arab man. Just recently the principal of a religious girls high school asked Rebbetzin Baranes to speak with is students because one of the girls was going out with an Arab man.
Sometimes women from the shelter will speak to the girls themselves, describing their horrifying experiences in attempt to discourage the girls from getting in to a similar situation. Parents are also encouraged to call Chasdei Meir if they have any suspicion that their daughter might be involved with an Arab.
"You have to realize that Arabs are everywhere. They are in every store and on the streets. When you order from the vegetable store, it is an Arab that brings the food to your house. I have a friend from Shmuel Hanavi who recently called me because his daughter started a relationship with the Arab delivery guy from the supermarket." Future Goals
Currently Chasdei Meir's shelter can only house about 25 women. This means that many women are forced to stay in their current situation. "There is a waiting list of women waiting to get in, but we have no place for them," says Chazen. "We try to get them some help but the help we can offer is limited without a place to put them." As soon as they have the financial resources, Chadei Meri plans to purchase the building where their shelter is located so that they will have the room to house more women. According to Maimonides*, there is no greater mitzvah than redeeming captives. This mitzvah is more important then feeding and clothing the hungry, supporting Hebrew schools or donating to your synagogues. By saving Jewish women from a life of servitude to their Arab captors, one is responsible for saving a whole generation of future Jews. As the Talmud teaches us, "Whoever saves a Jewish life saves an entire world."
